Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Two Scoops

I just celebrated what may be my final day of nursing Peabody with a dish of Ben & Jerry's Cookie Dough ice cream.

Since I'll be away from my sweet boy for nearly 4 days straight, I'm thinking it's possible, if not probable, that my milk will dry up this weekend. But maybe not, and I'll certainly offer to nurse him at bedtime, as I have done for many, many months now, when I get home. He's been happy to go to bed without me a few times this month, which gives me reassurance that he's ready and going to be fine if we do end up "weaning" (for want of a better way to put it, really) now.

It has been a wild and mostly wonderful ride, and I will miss breastfeeding if it's over, but I'm also proud, so proud, to have made it to now - Peabody's second birthday (minus two days), as a nursing pair. And a part of me is ready to let it go if now's the time. I'm ready for my cycle to be more back to my own "normal" (it's been very iffy for 2 years!) and to have my skin and hair and weight go back to normal, too. But I will miss the closeness with Matthew. I hope he'll be okay with cuddling and rocking before bed, because I would hate to give that up, too. I love my cuddly, sweet, lovey little boy so much.

Matthew will be TWO when I see him after this weekend (I'll be walking in the Susan G. Komen 3-Day for the Cure). I will miss his actual birthday on Saturday which makes me so sad, but we will celebrate him next weekend as a family. I can't believe he's 2 already, and lately have felt really nostalgic for the days just before and after his birth. He was the sweetest little newborn ever and I'd love to just hold that tiny Peabody again just one more time. But oh, what a wonderful toddler he is these days. He is talking more than ever and he totally has me wrapped around his little finger with his larger than life, crazy, silly, affectionate budding personality. I can't wait to see him every morning when he wakes up, and lately I've wanted to linger in his room at night after I've tucked him in, just to marvel at his sweet "Nigh-nigh"s and tell him over and over again how much I love him. (He loves me too. So much. I love how he loves me!)

I will post more soon about my charming little man. For now I just wanted to get some thoughts down and mark this special occasion. Two years! Never thought I could do it, but I did. We did. And I am so amazed by and thankful for that!

5 comments:

Leigh said...

Well done you with the breastfeeding! And wow, two years old. The only reason that I can believe he is that big, is because Sophie is two herself next week!! Oh how the time flies. I was looking at her baby pictures and can hardly believe that the noisy, headstrong, funny, adorable little curly headed girl once was so tiny.

Missi said...

I walked Day 1 of the Boston 3-Day 2010 on my son's 3rd birthday. When I told a Mom on the walk that I was missing my son's 3rd birthday she was so shocked....I thought I am walking so that no one has to miss a 3rd birthday for a reason other than choice. Bravo on the breastfeeding. I nursed both of my children - a noble calling.

Angela, East Central Illinois said...

Hi Megan! I've been reading both of your blogs since shortly before Peabody was born. I had just had my own 2nd peanut and have had a 3rd since then. I just love the way your writing makes me feel normal- even if it's only an illusion! I've found it more and more difficult to keep my journals for the girls up-to-date because they keep me so busy, but you've reminded me how important it is. Thanks for letting us into your life!

andrea said...

Hi there! I just came across your blog accidentally. I congratulate you for nursing as long as you did. How did it go with the walk? Did you return home w/milk? Did you two resume nursing?

I'm also a mom in my 40's. I am still nursing my 2 year old... he's about 2 1/2 now. He likes to nurse morning and evening. He goes to daycare, but on the weekends, he likes to nurse when he wakes from his nap. His dad and I are separated now, sadly. Yet the minute he comes home from his dad's place, the first thing he does after getting a hug and kiss from him is a request to nurse. It's a great way to reconnect, especially since I don't get to see him 2 nights a week.

Feel free to check out my blog if you wish. I also saw your main blog. Love it. :)

Take care! Let me know how the nursing went after your walk!

Linda Z said...

I nursed my kids a long time, too. It was bittersweet to let go. Such a special time! I hope your fundraising even goes really well. :)

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