34 Weeks, 1 Day

Wow. Where does the time go? It seems like I opened Mother's Day gifts last weekend, and here it is practically the Fourth of July! We've been really busy during the week with all of our summer activities and the weekends race by in a steady stream of nesty little household projects, errands, and the soaking up of the neighborhood summer life outside. Good to enjoy all these things now and for the next month or so, and then spend time with family and close friends after Peanut arrives. I actually think the timing of Peanut's due date works really well with the flow of life around here - we'll be ready to buckle down for newborn hibernation as the summer season winds down, and then during the winter months he'll be small and passive. Come spring, he'll be a bit more alert and sitting up, ready to take in a bit more of his world, and summer will find him on the move and probably up on his feet before fall comes and goes. The following summer he'll be almost two! A solid walker, likely ready to join the rest of the kids in play.

Peanut's red chair arrived today and is in his room, just waiting to be settled into for nursing, rocking, reading and snuggling. The room lacks just a few finishing details and then I'll post pictures of it for everyone to see. I think it's going to be perfect for him, and for all of us to enjoy with him, each in our own designated way.

With all the busy-ness of the past couple of weeks I've made myself pretty tired. As usual I'm not getting enough sleep and lately I'm not getting to lie down mid-day on my left side for a bit, which means the heartburn and the ankle swelling have been at all-time peak levels. This week will be somewhat less busy and I'm hoping I can reinsert some afternoon downtime (for me - Bean has been taking her naps as usual, although they aren't quite as long as I prefer and she needs) and get this body back feeling great again. I don't feel too bad though, for as tired as I am, in fact I'd say I'm better than ever for this pregnancy as I'm not sick AND I'm not depressed. Overall, I'm generally quite happy, in fact.

I am having the hip pain I remember from the latter days of carrying Bean. Just dull, pressurey achiness on each side, and sometimes accompanying lower back aches. What really makes it feel better is to have my hips pressed inward from each side, like they're being squeezed back together -- that's such a huge relief! As luck would have it, Bean has found a little game she loves to play - she sits on one of my hips and uses a strap from my maternity tank as reigns and then pretends I'm a flying unicorn pony. The pressure of her sitting on one hip as the other presses into the bed or the floor is AWESOME for the hip pain, and we are both quite well-pleased for a nice long time playing that game! Yay!

The girls are both producing tiny amounts of colostrum now. I'm really happy about that and I try not to obsess about it, but it really does come into my mind frequently as I go about each day. It's funny, to me. But I don't blame me, really. The breastfeeding issue has a bit of an emotional charge for me, and probably always will. I'm resolving NOT to allow myself to worry and drive myself crazy about it once Peanut's here though. I just want a peaceful time with my baby, and if that means formula, well, in the end whatever keeps my family in harmony and my baby happy and my heart at peace, that's the right thing to do. The pressure to be perfect in a situation I can't control completely is just not healthy for me or anyone else in the long run, and I don't want it tainting our time together now or in the future.

I think I've gained about 2 lbs. in the past 2 weeks - at my lightest I'm at 152 lbs. My body, though, doesn't look like it has gained any weight - just my belly. Al says from behind, or if I'm standing in a way that obscures my belly, he'd never even know I was pregnant. Even though I wouldn't much mind gaining weight all over because I know I could get it back off without too much effort, I'm glad I won't have a bunch to lose and maybe I'll get to wear my normal fall/winter wardrobe this year. I think I'd enjoy that - it'd be nice perk-me-up as I deal with all those fun post-natal hormonal readjustments.

It feels good to feel ready for Peanut. I just need to wash and put away all of his newborn and preemie (I wonder now if he'll really need the preemie things) clothes and get the diaper changing table all ready, and that will be it, really, besides just getting things together for the hospital visit.

I feel slighly apprehensive about the birth this time - much less so than I did with Bean - possibly just because I know more about it and I'm older and all that. I feel a little bit like I might somehow end up have a C-section, though I have no basis for that prediction. I just strangely feel it's possible this time. Everything went well for Bean's birth - maybe I just can't believe I'd be fortunate enough have two uncomplicated births and two perfectly healthy babies. Who knows. I think that was part of my reason for feeling so hesitant to do this all again.

So we're basically watching the calendar now. I will take belly shots today and get them into the gallery ASAP.