Friday, December 28, 2007

8 weeks - poisoned. i feel like i've been poisoned.

That's it! I've been trying to figure out what to liken this to, and it's being poisoned, or maybe chemotherapy? Which is, of course, pretty much poisoning someone *almost* to death. That's what I've come up with.

I've been asleep for as much of today as I could manage while still providing the basics of care and supervision for Bean. She's dressed. She's had little things to nibble on, and one actual meal for lunch. She's played a little on her own. Watched a shameful amount of TV. We took a bath.

I feel bad for her. She's certainly not being abused or neglected, really, but compared to her life as little as a month ago, it surely must FEEL to her like she's a little of both. Part of it is that she's chosen NOW (which is probably no accident) to start being a true little attitudey three-year-old. NOW to test me at every turn, when I don't have the patience or creativity to handle it any other way than just to send her to her room. NOW to start the stomping and the nasty little looks. I imagine with my zero tolerance/patience for anything she's likely going to get through it pretty quickly, anyway. Sigh.

The baby is the size of an olive this week. I love olives. Well, I loved olives. Now I don't love anything. To eat. I do love to sleep though. Pretty much anything else is completely useless to me. Every minute I'm awake I'm pretty much just looking forward to sleeping again. Welcome to the anti-Megan. Sheesh.

Had a wonderful two and a half day vacation from feeling really awful though, just in time for Christmas. I felt really nice all day Christmas day, then the day after, and half of yesterday. But by the evening yesterday the gross whole deal was back full swing. I guess my hormones took a few days off for the holiday, and are now back on the job. The baby will grow so much in the next few weeks - I think he/she gets to be the size of a lime in another 2-3 weeks. Amazing. So the hormones are necessary, I suppose. Enjoy them, little person. Maybe you could take a little more of them off my hands at a time so they wouldn't be leftover to make me so sick?

He/She has little hands and feet and fingers and toes now, or almost now. And in another week or two will have his/her little girl or boy bits out where they are visible. What are they, in there? Look down wouldja and knock on me once for boy, twice for girl, okay? You hear me?

Okay I have to go use some Listerine to get rid of this taste for a few minutes.

Wheeeeeeeeeeeee! I can't wait for this trimester to be OVER.

Eight weeks, though. That is nothing to sneeze at.

Which reminds me, I also have a cold. The Vick's Inhaler smells REALLY good to me. So I love sleep and my Vick's Inhaler. That's two things. I stand corrected.

Hey! I looked at my stats and whaddaya know? There are actually several people reading this! (I mean I knew a few of my sweet dear Diaryland friends were and a couple others who trekked over from FriedOkra, but now I think there are more, too!) Which is absolutely great! I'd love to know WHO'S reading, since this blog is a bit more personal and well, gutteral, at best. I feel a little exposed here, as you can imagine. Let me know who I'm exposing myself to, wouldja?


Jenn said...

Sorry to hear you're feeling crappy again. I remember feeling that way with Riley, like I wasn't being a very good mom to him when I was pregnant with Aislyn. He got a bit attitudey at that point with me too. Wanted more attention. Which is a hard thing to give when you're exhausted and unable to keep anything down. I hope you are feeling better VERY soon! ♥

Lerin said...

I absolutely HATED being pregnant with Bella and Ben... for different reasons, but I was so very sick. And you know what? I love them and it was worth it and I would do it all over again ten times. So don't feel "bad" about not enjoying this icky morning sickness-laden trimester. It will not matter to Peanut. :)

And, even reading all of this and remembering how much I dislike pregnancy... you are totally giving me baby fever. Again.

Melissa said...

You know I'm here, blogging gutterally about pregnancy vicariously through you. :o) Thanks for being honest and helping me realize I'm not the only one to not have the most ideal time with it.

Anonymous said...

Of course I am reading, you know. I just thought I'd remind you of that! You are such a trooper, soaring through this first trimester. I am so proud of you. Don't worry about Bean. She'll get over herself soon enough. Just tell her she needs to take care of you for a change. You are still a great mommy and you deserve some downtime sometimes! Heather and Cami

Nancy said...

So sorry for the poisoned effects you are feeling, but glad you made it through Christmas.. Hopefully the next trimester will be kinder to you.

Leigh said...

I am so sorry that you are feeling so sick. I was laid out bad enough with my stomach bug and that was only for 2 days! I really hope that this passes for you soon!

And I feel you on the whole bloated, feeling pregnant thing. I feel the same way and I don't know why as I certainly didn't with Emily.

I am glad that you had a good Christmas and I hope you have a great New Year (hopefully with less nausea!!)

Tara said...

I am one of the lurkers you are exposing yourself to! But please don't feel bad...I've got four kids and boy, have I been there. The last three (twins and then a singleton) were complete and total surprises! We were quite happy with one child. How does this keep happening? Oh, I kid. I know how it happens. And I've taken steps to be sure it never, ever happens again! I'll say a little "go away nausea" prayer for you!

Beth said...

I'm checking in to see how you are doing. Sorry you feel so icky! Hopefully only four more weeks of yuck! Hang in there!

linds said...

I am delurking, as I just stumbled upon your pregnancy blog the other day. I had just started reading your mamabean diary and then you moved over to blogspot, but I have been trying to keep up with you as I enjoy your writing. I found my way here through Lerin and Jenn. I also have a diary - if you would like to check it out. You can email me for the password lindzeeleighAThotmailDOTcom. Hope all is continuing to go well! Take care. :)

My Lil Family